


Neighbours

by BBCotaku



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Blind!Matt, Briarwoods do shady shit, Depression, Goth-nerd!Percy, I had to google some weird shit to write this, It's basically a soap opera, Multi, Tattoo artist!twins, human!Tibsy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-12
Updated: 2016-10-12
Packaged: 2018-07-23 12:47:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 14,513
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7463853
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BBCotaku/pseuds/BBCotaku
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In the beach-side city of Tal'dori a blind landlord watches over the Emon apartment complex. </p><p>A red brick building housing several oddballs from all walks of life.</p><p>The new home of certain a set of twins who've found themselves more than a little down on their luck.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Blind Man is King

_Vex'ahlia Doe._

Vex scribbled down the words in her notebook one last time, the letters curving into neatly looped cursive. 

Maybe she should write it down again? 

Maybe she should stop worrying like an idiot? 

With a deep sigh Vex tore out the page with a flick of her wrist. Crinkling her nose as she scrunched it up, she stuffed the wad of Vex'ahlia-Doe-scrawl into the pocket of her jeans, snapping her notebook shut. 

"Alright back there, love?" The taxi driver glanced at the set of twins through his rear view mirror. His brow slightly cocked in somewhat sarcastic curiosity. 

"Yes. Perfectly fine, Darling." Vex flashed the man a bright smile. Taking the brief opportunity to elbow her brother (who had promptly dozed off around five minutes into the journey, his head resting on her shoulder) in the ribs. 

"Hm?" The older of the two scowled at his sister through half-lidded eyes. "What?" 

"You're crushing me," Vex said out loud. _I don't want to talk to him, give me excuses,_ she added in silent thought. 

Vax'ildan—despite what some may have you believe—could not read his sisters mind, and so simply yawned and swapped to leaning against the car window. 

"I wouldn't go back to sleep just yet," the cab driver interrupted, gesturing to a three story, red-brick building the colour of rust coming into view at the end of the road with one hand. "That's old Emon there. Gods I didn't know it was still here." 

"Oh?" Vax wiped a path of drool from his chin. 

The driver nodded. "I lived there when I was a lad." 

Vax'ildan looked to his sister, mouthing _told you it was old as shit_ behind his fingers. 

The driver didn't seem to notice, or if he did he ignored it. "They've demolished most of the old buildings now," he lamented. "Good to see not all of Tal'dorei's gone to shit–pardon my language." 

The driveway leading up to the Emon apartment complex was lined with gravel the same colour as the building itself. The heavy crunch of shifting stones under the tires shaking up the cab something rotten as it trudged up towards the house.

"You alright back there Trinket?" Vex twisted round in her seat to come face-to-face with the sagging maw of her pet St Bernard. 

The dog's eyes narrowed slightly, his lips blowing out in what was probably a sigh. 

The corners of Vex's mouth fell into a frown. Her fingers reaching through the gaps in the wire-frame mesh separating the passages seats from the boot so as to comfort the dog best she could. 

"Oh, it's okay buddy," she whispered to Trinket, her voice rising a handful of octaves. "Just a little longer. Then I'll take you for a looong walk, okay?" 

Vax rolled his eyes as the taxi came to a slow, crunching, halt. Reaching to his pocket for his debt card. Well, it technically wasn't exactly his debt card but eh. What did it matter? Besides, he was an expert at guessing passcodes. 

"We have money," Vex hissed once her and Vax had exited the car. Her voice just quiet enough for only her brother to hear as she opened the car boot, finally allowing Trinket to get some fresh air. 

"Yeah, and whoever-the-fuck Aldor is doesn't." Vax'ildan tapped his pocket, grinning mischievously from ear to ear. "He didn't need it."

The twins set about unloading what little belongings they had (each only having a single suitcase). A task which Vex enough time to realise high-heeled boots were in no way suitable for this driveway. 

As she hobbled about on one foot, rubbing her ankle the cabby stuck his head out the driver's side window. "Hey, if ya get the chance, tell the old man Mercer John says hi." And then he was gone, pulling back off onto the main road and leaving Vex and Vax Doe standing before the towering bulk of a build probably older than both their ages combined.

XXX

Emon's landlord, Matthew Mercer, lived in the building's one and only ground-level apartment and for good reason. He was blind as a bat. However this had little to do with his age as he was in reality nowhere near as old as the taxi-driver had implied. 

In fact, the man who opened the landlord's front door looked only a handful of years older than the twins. With shoulder length auburn hair and eyes hidden behind blue-tinted, circular lens, a white cane in one hand.

"Vex'ahlia and Vax'ildan, right?" The man asked, his head slightly raised so he looked a touch above the twins head. 

The twins nodded taking a little longer than they probably should have to realise their mistake. 

"Oh, um, yes." Vex stuttered, her cheeks turning slightly pink. "We came to get the keys. This is Matthew Mercer's apartment yes?" 

"Yep." Matthew turned round, heading back inside his apartment. "Come in, take a seat." He waved a hand to his living room couch. "Keep away from the armchair though, that ones mine. Tea?"

At the offer of drinks Vax made a noise that sounded something akin a squark. An action that made Mercer chuckle. 

"I'm a grown man, I can make tea without burning myself," he reassured, tapping his cane as he made his way over to the kitchenette. 

As well as an excellent thief, Vax was also a little shit. Which was why it did not surprise Vex when he made a b-line for Mercer's apparently out-of-bounds chair. Just as he was about to sit down, the landlord stop pouring tea from the hot water dispenser on the counter, giving a sigh before shooting Vax a stern look over his shoulder. 

"Don't even think about it, Vax'ildan."

The older of the twins froze, looking to his sister with wide eyes. _How in the hell?_ He mouthed as Vex held back a snort. 

Without so much as a word Vax joined his sister and her dog by Mercer's couch, looking glum. 

Contrary to popular belief making hot drinks wasn't too difficult for someone hard of seeing, so long as no one else interfered. Small clips the size of Matt's thumb hung off the rim of each of mug made a loud, sharp beep as the water met the right level, allowing for him to fix two cups of tea without any fuss.

"What brings you two to Tal'dori anyway?" Mercer asked as he carefully lifted the tea bags out. 

The twins looked to each other, Vex bit her lip. 

"Just fancied a change of scene," she answered quickly, her hands bawled into fists, her French-tipped nails cutting deep indents into her palms. "You know how it is, can't live at home forever." 

"True," Mercer smiled, placing two steaming mugs of tea on the coffee table before the couch, and for a moment Vex and Vax were sure he was looking directly at them. "You two are kinda strange, your circumstances I mean." 

Vex felt anxiety rise in her throat. "Oh?" 

"Yeah," Matt replied jovially, plonking himself down in his arm chair. "I've never heard of a moving service actually arriving on time. Let alone before the tenants."

Vax looked as though he was ready to throttle him. "Ha. Funny." He tried his best to sound convincing, though his expression remained rather hostile. His brow furrowed, lips curled downwards into a heavy frown. 

As though to lighten the mood Mercer gave a sharp whistle, causing Trinket to raise his head, looking first to Vex before padding over to the landlord for a scratch behind their ears. 

"I try my best." Keeping one hand on Trinket's head Matt dug into the pockets of his jeans, chucking two sets of keys in the rough direction of the twins. 

Vax caught both keyrings, a smug look of satisfaction and pride a on his face as his hands curled around each object thrown his way with expert grace. 

"Welcome to Emon kids."


	2. How Good Neighbours become Good Friends

Apartment 2-B was, all in all, rather small. Two bedrooms and one bathroom split off from a living room and kitchenette. The furniture dotted about was pretty plain, cream coloured walls, a hideously orange, glass coffee table and a television the size of a cardboard box.

"Nice," Vex cringed at the sight of the room. "Who designed this place?"

Vax shrugged, dragging both his and Vex's suitcases into the front room. "Marshal? I dunno." He dropped the cases to the ground, kicking the door shut as Trinket padding in behind him, tail wagging steadily. "Bags the biggest room."

"Like hell!"

What followed was a mad dash to the closer of the two bedroom doors. Both rooms weren't really anything special, however one was noticeably wider than the other.

"I'm oldest," Vax yelled through the bedroom door. His back pushed hard up against it as his sister attempted to force it open with her shoulder.

"Stop being a brat, Vax! Let me in."

"Nah."

"I have to share with Trinket!" Vex'ahlia pointed out, trying the door knob.

"You don't _have_ to." Vax clamped his hands around the handle on his end, the metal slipping against the cloth of his gloves, fingerless of course. "He can sleep in the living room, can't you Trinket?"

The dog looked up from where he lay on the carpet, spread eagled across a majority of the floor. He looked to the door, then to his owner before letting out a loud bark.

"See, he agrees with me!" Both twins yelled out at the same time.

Disinterested in the sibling's tiff, Trinket got to his feet, sniffing at the ground as he shuffled to the front door. A small, low, bark escaping from his maw.

Vex cocked her head curiously, loosening her grip on the door handle

"What's the matter buddy?" She asked, her voice followed by a series of rapped taps against wood as someone knocked on the door, quite enthusiastically.

"Who's that?" Vax poked his head round the bedroom door.

Vex shrugged, stepping gingerly towards the door. "Maybe we left something at Mercer's?" She suggested, not managing to convince herself, let alone her brother.

As the door opened the two set eyes on quite possibly the most beautiful woman either of them had ever seen. Shocking red hair that tumbled down her back, her head adorn with a crown of white and pink flowers, her eyes bright apple-green and practically starry with excitement.

The woman didn't even bother to glance at the two twins, pointing a finger directly at Trinket.

"I knew I heard a dog!" She squealed, kneeling down and glomping Trinket into tight bear hug.

"Uh..." The twins shot each other a bewildered look.

"Who are you?" Vax started to say, before being swiftly interrupted by another person hurrying down the hallway.

"Highness, perhaps it would be best to wait—oh." A dark-skinned man with shoulder-length hair which rivalled his friend's in colour, tied up in a tight, short ponytail, his ears loaded down with an assortment of gold piercings. "Oh, hello," he paused in the doorway holding out a hand to shake." "I'm Tiberius Stormwind, from apartment 3-B."

A long pause hung in the air as Vax slowly reached out to accept Tiberius's handshake. "Vax'ildan. Uh, whose your friend?"

"Oh, Keyleth. She likes animals."

"Whose a good puppy?" Keyleth cooed, scratching Trinket's chin, oblivious to those around her.

"You don't say." Vex quirked her brow, her hands resting against her hips. "You alright there?" She asked Keyleth.

"Oh yeah, I'm good," Keyleth beamed, sitting cross legged by Trinket's side. "Sorry, I've always wanted a dog. But we live on the top floor so it would be a pain to take it up and down the stairs all the time."

"Yeah," Vex's mouth rose into a crooked smile. "But they're worth it, aren't you Trinket?"

Trinket barked in agreement. Though Vex couldn't help but notice a slight gleam to his eye that seemed to scream "help me" as Keyleth stroked at his face.

Tiberius smiled, his arms folded across his chest . "She's a rather cute dog."

Vex straightened up, her eyes narrowed. " _She_?"

Vax tutted, holding back a laugh as he clapped a hand on his neighbour's shoulder. "You just made a huge mistake," he dead panned.

"Trinket's a boy!" Vex cried, glaring daggers at her new neighbour.

"Tiberius! Apologise to Trinket." Keyleth hugged Trinket's head to her chest, the dog fumbling under her touch in an attempt to pull away.

Tiberius' brow quirked, his eyes moving pleadingly to Vax, who gave his shoulder another pat.

"You just opened the gates to hell, man."

Vax'ildan had heard his sister's "Trinket's-gender" speech more times than he could count. Hell, he'd been on the receiving end of it a few times as a boy.

On any other day, at any other time, he would have zoned out, let the lecture take its course as he though of other, more pressing matters like whether or not he'd remembered to turn of the stove. What made this time, standing in the threshold of an unfamiliar room in an unfamiliar city with unfamiliar people, different was simply the fact that Vex had co-lecturer.

The red-haired woman, Keyleth, seemed just as concerned at Trinket's wellbeing as Vex'ahlia. The two strangers tag teaming against a rather confused-looking Tiberius—The poor sod.

As entertained by this as he was Vax wasn't one to pass on an opportunity. Taking great care to act, largely unnoticed, as he slipped back into his rightful bedroom along with his suitcase.

It didn't take him long to unpack his bag, the content of which consisted entirely of random items of clothing he'd grabbed from his closet in a mad grab for what was important. In his rush he'd forgotten stupid things; pyjamas, his comb and even his fucking toothbrush were all abandoned in a packing frenzy (though past-Vax'ildan had managed to swipe a tube of toothpaste, because past-Vax'ildan was a fucking idiot).

He could only hope Vex'ahlia had been a little more prepared in her packing.

His clothes packed away Vax'ildan returned to the front room, parking his butt on the centre cushion of the candy-orange sofa.

There wasn't really anything more to be done. Vex and Trinket had disappeared into her room to unpack, the two inhabitants of apartment 3-B had scarpered, most of general house-caring B.S had been sorted out before their arrival and the TV air-waves were filled primarily by shitty day-time crime dramas that left a bad taste in Vax's mouth.

And so, bored and with noting else to do, Vax took a small item wrapped in cloth from his jacket pocket. A torsion wrench, lock pick and a clear plastic padlock that allowed the pins to been seen from the outside.

He'd locked and unlocked this practice lock so many times it had practically become second nature, but there was no harm in sharpening one's skills.

He became so engrossed in his little task that he barely noticed when someone opened his front door.

"Hello?" A short man wearing—of all things—a beret, stuck his head round the door, causing Vax to, appropriately, jump out his skin.

"What the fuck are you doing in my house?!" He cried, holding the pick out as though it were a knife.

The man look genuinely confused. "Well I just wanted to ask for a hand but if your going to threaten me with a...toothpick?...I'll just leave."

"Wait," Vax shoved his pick and lock back into his pocket. "Who are you?"

The man stepped further into the apartment, the guitar case slung over his shoulder (which was only a few inches smaller than him) banging softly against the door. "Scanlan Shortholt, musician-comedian extraordinaire. I live next door."

Vax narrowed his eyes. "And?"

"And I wanted a hand carrying something up the stairs," Scanlan shrugged. "Could you help or...?"

 

 _You broke into my flat to ask me that_? "Yeah...I guess." Vax got off the couch slowly, glancing to his sister's bedroom door. Could she not hear him? What was she doing?

"What do you need me to do?" Vax asked cautiously, not daring to stray too far from the apartment threshold.

Scanlan grinned, waving a hand in the direction of the stairwell. "I've got some speakers I need to carry up," he explained. "I left them outside Mercer's apartment."

"Isn't that a bit dangerous?"

"He'll be fine." Scanlan fiddled with the strap of his guitar case. "I need to pack this away real quick, meet you downstairs?"

 _What the fuck am I doing?_ "Yeah, downstairs. Got it."

Vax'ildan left Scanlan outside his flat, heading down to the ground floor, his hands tucked into his pocket as he went over the events of the past few hours in his head.

The inhabitants of Emon were definitely weird. Or maybe it was just a Tal'dori thing in general. An off-colour city for off-colour people.

As Vax thought this the carpeted steps of Emon suddenly crunched under his feet as he stepped onto a plastic tarp that spread across the floor for a good couple of steps.

A plastic tarp that had definitely not been there when he went up.

Just as Vax prodded the new floor-accessory with his toe, a downpour of icy-cold water struck his back.

"Fucking, fuck fuck!" Vax froze, his body going ridged as ice water coated him from head to toe.

A deep, booming laugh rang through the stairwell. "Gottcha Scanlan—aw shit."

Lips peeled back into a glare Vax looked up to see the pale, square-jawed face of a man peeking over the banister, a large bucket that had previously held the water gripped in hand.

"Uh..." The man's face went bright red before disappearing from sight.

It took a moment for Vax to return to reality.

"Oi!" He bolted up the stairs two at a time. "Get back here!"

But it was too late, as Vax stepped off onto Emon's third and final floor to see the door to apartment 3-A slam shut.

Teeth chattering, he banged his fist hard against the door. "Prick!"

Scanlan Shortholt leant against the front door of apartment 2-A, a grin that would do the Cheshire Cat proud stretched across his face. "That was Grog," he said, his voice shaking slightly with laughter. "I have a pretty good feeling that was meant for me. He's not the sharpest tool in the shed so he probably thought I wouldn't notice the water-proof sheet."

Vax said nothing. His lips curled into a sharp frown as he reached forward, grabbed the beret from the short man's head and stormed back into his apartment.

"The fuck happened to you?" Vex asked as she looked up from where she'd set herself, spread-eagled, across the couch.

"Neighbours. Here, you wanted a hat right?" Vax threw her the slightly damp, burrowed-up flat cap with a scowl. "I'm gonna take a shower. Also watch out for the guys from upstairs," he warned.

"Tiberius and Keyleth?"

"No, Scanlan and Grog. I am going to murder them."

Secretly, Vax had hoped he wouldn't see either Scanlan or Grog for at least three months minimum. Alas, fate had a different idea.

Around six o'clock that evening both men were standing at his doorstep, dragged there by the collars of their shirts by a woman the size of a eight-year-old.

"Scanlan and Grog wanted to apologise," the woman said, her arms crossed.

"Well," Grog cocked his head. "You wanted us to—"

The woman shot Grog a withering look.

"—Right, sorry for pouring water on you n' like." He rubbed the back of his neck. "We wanted to...I wanted to play a prank, but I didn't think you'd come down or nuffing. Cause, like, I knew my buddy Scanlan needed to go to a concert. N' I thought the plastic would catch all the water n'...yeah..."

The woman looked to Scanlan, who gave a loud sigh.

"I'm sorry for using you as a mining canary."

Vax'ilan hid his hands behind his back. "Yeah, no problem." He crossed his fingers. "It's just a prank, right?"

"Uh...yeah." Grog blinked dumbly. "Friends?"

"Friends," Vax agreed. His fingers raking through his hair, untying his braid.

"Good," the woman gave a small nod to Vax. "I'm sorry about all this."

"Yeah, no it's fine. Uh..."

"Pike."

"It's fine Pike. No hard feelings."

Vax waited until Grog had turned his back to head back upstairs to stretch the hair band back between his fingers, letting the projectile fly and strike him dead centre on the back of the head.

"It's on motherfucker!" Was all he said as he slammed the door shut behind him.

"Making friends with the neighbours?" Vex asked. The apartment didn't actually have a dining table, so instead they settled to eating their takeaway sitting round the coffee table in front of the TV. The tabletop buried deep under cardboard pizza boxes dripping with grease.

"Best friends." Vax let his long hair fall round his shoulders, tucking it behind his ears so it didn't obscure his sight.

The weirdness of the twin's first day ended with the apology. Giving the twins a handful of hours of peace and quiet to spend curled up on the couch, Trinket on their feet, their stomachs full of pizza as they marathoned shitty sci fi movies with effects that made cardboard cutouts look realistic.

Around two o'clock that morning Vax's head slumped to his chest as he nodded off, leaving Vex to flick through the few channels their television managed to pick up. Eventually she settled on what she thought was an allergy medication ad, but quickly found herself watching an odd bout of art-film mindfuckery.

Probably not the best show to be watching before going to bed.

Closing her eyes Vex listened to the sound of cars passing outside, of Trinket's hushed barks as he twitched about in his sleep, of the creeks and groans of the building's age.

Neither she nor Vax could have predicted the explosion about to thunder through the apartment from two floors below.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've put two pop culture references in this chapter, I wonder if anyone can find them both.


	3. The Boy in the Basement

It was as though everything had started to move at double the speed. 

In what felt like a brief moment Vax had awoken and jumped to his feet, quickly followed by Vex. 

"What the fuck was that?!" He cried, his eyes glued to the front door, fists clenched, arms raised into a haphazard combat stance. 

"A bomb?" Vex suggested, her heart pounding against her chest. "It didn't sound like a gun. Too loud." 

Vax clenched his jaw, dashed over to the kitchenette and digging through random drawers until his found where the steak knives were kept. 

"What are you doing?" 

"Going downstairs, what does it look like?" 

Vex could nearly hear her brother of the sound of Trinket's loud and near constant barks. She put a finger to her lips to hush the dog. "Are you fucking insane?!" 

"Maybe?" Vax pushed past her. "You coming?" 

Vex didn't hesitate. "Of course." 

***

A man with striking white hair the colour of snow stood at the top of the stairs leading down to Emon's basement. A construction mask with a shoddy attempt at a smiling mouth draw across it covered the bottom half of his face, the shin of his glasses hiding his eyes. 

Vax skidded to a halt at the bottom of the stairs, his heart jumping in fright as Vex bumped into the back of him. 

"What was that sound?" Vax asked, holding up the steak knife, the weapon that feeling feeble in his hand. "What's going on?"

"Hm?" The man tugged down the mask, letting it fall round his neck. "Is the knife really necessary?" He asked.

Vex stepped round her brother. "There was an explosion." 

"Oh, yeah." The man rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly, casting a weary eye to the basement stairs. "That was me. There was a...um...slight miscalculation." 

" _Slight_ miscalculation?" Vax echoed, letting his hand fall to his side, though the tenseness in his shoulders did not falter. He looked like a spring trap that has been wound up too tight. 

"Yeah, it happens from time to time." The man straightened his glasses. "You're the newbies from 2-B?"

The twins nodded. 

"I suppose I should introduce myself then." The man cleared his throat, taking in a small breath. "My name's Percival Fredrickstein Von Musel Klossowski de Rolo the third—" 

"Bullshit." The word spilled from Vax's mouth before he could stop himself. "That cannot be your name." 

As he spoke to door to Mercer's apartment creaked open, revealing the dishevelled and sleep-deprived landlord. "It is," he mumbled, mid yawn. "I though he was joking when I first read it. Believe me it's a lot weirder in Braille." His head moved slightly in the direction of Percival's voice. His right hand resting on the threshold of his door like a tether. "Do I have to call 911?" 

Percy shook his head out of habit. "Just made a bit of a bang, no flames." 

"Good. Eyebrows?"

At this Percy let out a loud groan. "That was one time." 

Matt laughed, the corner of his mouth rising into a sleepy, slightly crooked smile. "As if we'd let you live that down." 

"I'm sorry, what's going on?" Vex asked, raising an unneeded hand to signal silence. 

Matt gestured vaguely into the hall. "Percival Frederick Von whats-his-name. Emon's local tinkerer. Makes stuff mostly, and on rare occasions blows stuff up instead." 

Vax opened his mouth, hesitated and promptly shut it again. "Yeah, fine. That makes sense I guess." He rubbed his eyes with the back of his hand. "Exploding random shit at 3am doesn't sound exactly legal, but fuck it. Today's been bizarre enough as it is." And with that he walked away, heading back upstairs and taking his knife with him. 

"He gone?" Matt asked. 

Vex watched her brother leave. "Yeah. Hey Percival?"

"Just Percy will do fine," he answered, taking off his glasses to clean them on the hem of his hoodie. They were weird, circular spectacles with two additional circles of wire at either end that Vex couldn't quite determine the purpose of. 

"Right," she looked him up and down, taking it all in; His blue hoodie, his glasses, his mask and hair that defied natural coloration. He defiantly looked like the kind of person to have a few screws loose. "What were you making exactly?" 

Percy continued cleaning his lenses. "Rat repellent."

"Rat repellent." Vex repeated the words with wide eyes. "Firstly, Rat repellent doesn't explode. Secondly, surely that's his job," she pointed a finger to Matt. 

"Yeah it is," Matt admitted with a shrug. "I offered to call a exterminator, but he insisted on doing it himself." 

"It was cheaper than hiring someone else to do it," Percy added smugly. 

Matt perked up. "It worked then?"

"Yes. Well. Probably. It was meant to realise a vapour, that would spread without much trouble...but now my room's flooded with it so..." Percy raised his hands in a shrug. 

"So long as it's still up to code, I guess." Matt yawned, covering his mouth with his hand. "I'm going to bed, don't destroy my house." 

This left Vex and Percy alone in the hall and for a brief moment they just stood there, neither truly sure of what to do next. After a long, awkward pause Percival turned and started towards the front door of Emon. 

"Where you going?" Vex asked, causing him to stop mid step. 

"Smoke," Percy took a black, seemingly labeless packet of cigarettes from the pocket of his hoodie, giving it a quick shake. "I've got to wait for the repellent to fade. It bloody stinks," he hesitated. "I'm sorry for waking you and your brother by the way." 

"Oh," Vex waved her hand as though to waft away his apology. "Don't be, darling. I'm sorry my brother tried to stick a knife in you." 

Percy chuckled. "It's fine." He smiled, placing a cigarette between his lips, tugging open the door. "It's refreshing to meet someone else as paranoid as me."


	4. The Slayer's Take

Pike Trickfoot's Saturday routine consisted mainly of working the night shift at Tal'dori General Hospital's A&E ward. As a result her Sunday routine centred primarily around catching up on her missed sleep.

Her flatmate, Grog, did his best to keep the apartment quite when he knew she was sleeping. She'd never asked him to, but then again she didn't exactly have to. Grog was dumb yes, dumb as a post in fact, but not rude. Well. Most of the time anyway.

"Oi! Big man."

Unlike the asshole currently banging at his door like his life depends on it.

Grog tugged open his door to see Vax'ildan at his doorstep, one fist half raised to knock, the other gripping the rumbled form of a jacket.

Before Vax'ildan could open his mouth Grog covered it with his hand. "Shh," he hissed lowly. "Pike is sleepin'."

Vax narrowed his eyes into a sour squint, the fist holding his jacket clenching so tightly that the teeth of its zipper dig into his palm. He had a sibling, he knew what to do in this situation. He flicked out his tongue, Grog's hand instantly recoiling as it pressed against his fingers.

"Ew, wut the fuck?!" Grog rubbed his hand on his bomber jacket, his face turning scarlet as anger bubbled up in his chest. "Wut was that for?!"

Vax practically threw his jacket in Grog's face. "It shrunk," he explained, frowning bitterly. "You owe me a new one."

"Nah, I don't."

Vax let out a low, impatient sigh that sounded more like a hiss than anything. "Do I have to remind you about the fucking downpour?" He grumbled, crossing his arms. "It's your fault, asshole."

"Dun't you have another one?—N' keep your voice down."

Vax did indeed have another jacket. However this jacket just so happened to be two states over, abandoned at his dad's. There was no way in all the nine hells he'd go back to get it now. He couldn't, even if he wanted to.

"No, I don't. Can you get me a new one? Please?" The 'Please' is short and sharp, done more out of habit than anything.

"Who you talking to Grog?" The previously mentioned Trickfoot padded out of her room in slippers and a bath robe and little much else. Her blonde, almost white, hair sticking up and about her head like an old chimney brush, a thin scar running down her cheek though she didn't look like the kind of person to get into a brawl.

"Pike," Vax gave a small wave, averting his gaze.

The small woman gave a sigh, slumping her shoulders. "What he do now?"

"Who?" Grog asked.

"You," Pike answered. She shot Vax an apologetic look as he, quite rightly and appropriately, face palmed.

It took less than a minute for Vax to explain the situation, and only a minute more for Pike to point him in the direction of 3-B.

"You're better off asking Tiberius about shopping," she'd said, handing Vax a fistful of bills. "He's a bit of a shopaholic."

Grog scoffed. "A _bit_."

Vax had no problem taking money from Grog, the prick owed him. However as saw Pike fish into a handbag left by the front door of her apartment he couldn't help but feel guilty. After all, as far as he knew Pike had done nothing wrong.

Tiberius opened his door looking slightly frazzled, his long fringe held atop his head by a clip, a pen behind his ear and an unreasonably thick book tucked under his arm.

"Pike said you'd show me where I can go shopping."

Tiberius' eyes lit up. "A trip to the Slayer's Take is it? I'd be happy to take you!" Despite being of the same age as Vax the other man spoke as though he'd just stepped out of 1840s London. Turning on his heel Tiberius went to hurry back inside saying; "I could use a bit of a break. Go upstairs and grab Keyleth, she wanted to pick up some stuff."

"...We're on the top floor—" before Vax's questioning could fully make its way from his mouth Tiberius had kicked the door shut.

This left Vax to find the door to Emon's roof top garden by himself, feeling much akin to a pass-the-passel being tossed from one person to another. From Grog to Pike to Tiberius and finally, to Keyleth.

The red-haired woman at the moment knelt with dirt up to her elbows beside a neatly boxed bed of vibrant daffodils. Her head was covered by a wide-brimmed hat rather than her usual flower crown, her clothes loose and cooly coloured, her feet bare and stained dark with dirt.

He cleared his throat. "Wanna go shopping?"

Keyleth yanked up a weed by its roots. "Sounds fun." The flora fell into the bucket that had previously held Vax's downpour with a muffled slap.

"I didn't know there was a garden up here," Vax continued as Keyleth dusted earth from her hands.

"I started it a year or so ago."

Vax let out a low, long whistle, his eyes moving from flowerbed to flowerbed. "Only a year?"

"Yeah." The young woman puffed out her chest with pride. "I'm good with plants, though everyone chips in from time to time so I can't really take all the credit."

The conversation came to a trickle before running out. Keyleth took up her pail and plodded past Vax, stepping on her tiptoes like a toddler just figuring out walking.

"Oh!" Spinning round Keyleth tapped a muddy finger to her forehead, leaving behind a smudge. "Which one are you?"

***  
The Slayer's Take shopping mall was laid out thusly:

Shops (over ninety, as the website boasted) of all kinds surrounded a central fountain, clumped together in loosely defined categories. Clothing shops to the east, groceries, sweets and café to the west, technology, craft and books to the south and what could only be defined as "miscellaneous" to the north.

But Vex, Vax, Keyleth and Tiberius were neither east nor west nor south nor north. Rather the four were sat on the edge of the dinky stone fountain, each holding an ice pop in hand.

"Okay, one last time." Keyleth raised her finger, pointing it to the twin with the slightly squarer jaw. "Vex."

"Vax," he deadpanned, his mouth full of the chemically taste of "summer punch." Whatever the hell that was.

"We're not even identical, darling," Vex mumbled, digging through her purse, her teeth aching as she bit down on ice.

"Identical twins are usually the same gender," Tiberius explained, pushing his glasses up his nose. "Unless one of you were transgender—"

"Okay!" Vex pulled out a scrap piece of paper from the depths of her bag. "We need shampoo, conditioner, hair bands—since someone lost his."

Vax rolled his eyes, tucking a lock of hair behind his ear. "The big guy had it coming."

"Sure he did, brother." Vex went back to her list. "People food and dog food aaannd," she pointed to Keyleth with the end of her ice pop.

"Oh, peppers, garlic and onions," Keyleth counted each item on her fingers.

"That's oddly specific," Vax noted, one brow quirked.

"Pesticide," Keyleth stated, waving a casual hand. "Looks like it'll be a girls day out," she said to Vex. "Tibsy and your brother can go get a jacket."

Tiberius ummed and uhhed. "Well, actually, I need to get some textbooks—"

"I'm pretty sure we're running out of room for books," Keyleth quipped, only half kidding.

Tiberius' expression turned grave. "We'll make room."

Once the Ice-treats finished being eaten the party split off. Vax to the east, his sister and Keyleth to the west and Tiberius to the south.

Or rather, these are the direction each member assumed they went. In reality Vex'ahlia and Keyleth did indeed travel west, and Tiberius followed the scent of old books and paint to the south. Vax'ildan Doe however, well. Vax'ildan Doe royally fucked up and headed north.


	5. A Day Out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *looks at hit number* heh. That's a lot of people.   
> Thank yous for reading and commenting, I've never had as good a reception to a fic as this before and it's blown me away! 
> 
> And now. I wish to explain something;
> 
> I have set up a rule that I cannot kill any character who hasn't died for good on the show. Okay? Okay!

Halfway to the nearest grocers something—or someone—knocked Vex'ahlia flying.

"Oh my goodness! Excuse me, I didn't mean too—" A girl with askew glasses and black, birds nest hair turned bright pink, backing a good few steps away from Vex. "—Oh! Um..." She hugged a tray that had previously held a collection of taste-test pudding cups to her chest, her eyes fixed on the front of Vex's shirt, or more, the painting of vanilla pudding now coating it. "Here, let me!" Without giving Vex a moment to reply the girl started rubbing at the front of her shirt with her fingers, further spreading the mess.

"What the?" Vex looked the Keyleth out of their corner of her eyes, only to find the red-head doubled over and laughing. Traitor. "Uh...It's fine, darling. Really."

"No, no. I'm dreadfully sorry. It's all my fault, I'm sorry. I tripped over the hem of my skirt. It's a bit big, but I hoped I'd grow into it you know?" The girl stopped embedding sludge into the fabric of Vex's shirt to pluck at the ruffles of her full-length skirt.

Vex blinked dumbly, leaning as far away from the girl as she could. "Uuhhh..."

"Lee-ra, vat are you doing?" An albino woman wearing a similar black skirt and white frilled shirt to the pudding-girl took her by the shoulder, a shallow frown on her lips.

"Oh, I was just handing out these samples. See, Aldore asked me if I could fill in for him—"

"You're meant to ve in the vack room." The albino shot Vex an apologetic look. "I'm sorry, Lee-ra's a vit clumsy. Come, I'll clean you up."

Keyleth and Vex exchanged quizzical looks before following the mystery girl towards a shop labeled "Guild Room Sweets and Café."

"Lillith!" Pudding-girl crossed her arms defiantly over her bosom. "I'm the manager, you should be asking me before you take customers to the staff room."

Lillith's lips pursed, her jaw clenching as she gave a loud, long sigh. "I am going to kill Aldore," she hissed under her breath. "Don't muck anything else up, Boss." Her accent made it difficult to tell if she had cussed or not.

"I am so sorry about viss," Lillith said as soon they were out of ear shot.

"She's your boss?" Keyleth asked, her eyebrows raised.

"I don't know how it happened either." Lillith shook her head in dismay, pushing open a "staff only" door behind the counter of a quant, slightly rustic looking café. Before Keyleth or Vex had time to say anything their guide yelled into the room at the top of her lungs; "Aldore! Vhy in the hells is Lee-ra on the floor?!

"What?" A man wearing a similar outfit to his fellow employees paced the length of the room, one hand to his brow, the other holding a phone to his ear. "I'm a bit busy at the moment—yeah sorry." He turned his attention back to his mobile. "Yes? Look, I'm missing over a hundred dollars, can't you do anything?"

Vex's brow creased uneasily. "What's up with him?"

"Someone stole vis credit card," Lillith explained, making her way over to a small basin in the corner of the staff room.

Vex winced. "Oh shit."

***

Allura Vysoren was one of those people who had looks everyone could appreciate, regardless of sexuality. As a plus she was also an all round pleasant person, an all round pleasant person who just so happened to work at the bookshop Tiberius just so happened to frequent.

"Tiberius," she smiled softy, her elbows propped up against the counter. "I thought you'd be studying."

"I'm on break," Tiberius didn't so much "speak" these words as "announce" them. His tone slightly louder than what would be considered appropriate for an indoor voice. "Besides, I fancied getting some more research material." He took a tentative step towards the store's mythology section. "Can't have a thesis without some back up."

Allura's sigh made her fringe ruffle, her shoulders slumping slightly as she stretched her arms across the counter, her head tipping down so she faced the floor. "Gods above," she looked at Tiberius through her hair. "Uriel is going to fail it, you know he is."

"Uriel" referred to the duo's mythology 101 professor, a man who Tiberius often struggled to impress.

"I have proof," Tiberius insisted, raising a finger as though to punctuate his point. "The mythology of Tal'dorei aren't just silly stories, it's history!"

Most people looked at Tiberius with pity when he but forward his idea that the monsters, heroes and villains of Tal'dorei's local folklore were actual recounts of past events rather than simple tall tales. Their noses would scrunch up, their brows furrowing in a way that always seeming to say: How exactly are you the smart one?

Allura was different however. She looked over the odd scribbles of Tiberius' notes with what can only be described as bewildered fascination. She viewed Tiberius' thesis in the same way some atheists viewed the beliefs of the religious.

She in no way understood it, but then again that wasn't really the point. This mutual understanding formed the basis to the reason the two became friends and, admittedly, the reason why Tiberius was rather smitten with his fellow classmate(even if these feeling were in no way reciprocated).

But everyone has a patience and Allura's had started wearing thin.

"Fine, fine." She straightened. "I suppose it'll at least be interesting. Better than connecting them to morals seen in today's society like everyone else," she cut off herself with a yawn. "'Suse me."

"Up late?"

Allura nodded. "A friend was helping me study and we lost track of time."

"Who?" Tiberius couldn't help but feel jealous and cursed himself for it.

"No one you know, they don't go to our uni." She smiled for a moment, a soft, reminiscent grin. "She's nice though." She blinked and she was back to reality. "Tiberius." Allura craned her neck to look behind her friend.

"Yes?"

"You're making a queue."

***

Vax sighed, looked round, sighed again.

Yeah. He'd fucked up.

He raked his fingers through his hair, pushing his bangs from his eyes as he searched in vain for any sign of a clothing store.

Nothing. Well, not exactly nothing.

A comic shop reeking of Mountain Dew could be seen to his left, a furniture display advertising forty-percent off a reclining sofa to his right. But no clothes.

Zip, nada, none.

Vax scratched his head, wincing. He couldn't exactly call anyone to ask for help. Not without handing over blackmail material to his sister, which—as he had learnt many times over—Did. Not. Go. Well.

He moved over to the side of the walkway, out of paths of the heaping mass of shoppers searching for a good deal, and as he did Vax spotted a white flash out the corner of his eye. A white sign written with thick red sharpie:

HELP WANTED

TATTOO FLASH WORK

ASK CHASEW FOR DETAILS

The last line was enough to make Vax push open the door to TATTOO AND PIERCINGS, after all, jacket or not he did need a job.

The shop inside was the usual tattoo parlour affair and what was meant by that was it was dank as hell. Decked out in wall to wall grunge punk and leather. Behind the main counter sat a man a good few inches too big for it. His hair was shoulder-length and the colour of chocolate, a band wrapped across his forehead giving him the appearance of a monk, something offset ever-so-slightly by the sleeve of tattoos stretching up his right arm.

"Can I help you?" The man asked disinterestedly, his voice harsh and rough as sandpaper.

Vax slipped his hands neatly into his trouser pockets. "You Cashew?"

The man gave a great sigh, clapping his hands together under his chin before suddenly yelling: "Fuck you, Z!" At the top of his lungs.

Somewhere at the back of the shop a woman burst out laughing. "Well you asked me to write the sign, Darling," the voice called back, though the owner made no effort to make herself seen.

Shaking his head the man turned his attention back to Vax. "The name's Kashaw, most call me Kash. What do you want?"

Vax glanced over his shoulder to the Help Wanted sign "...a job?"

"You a tattoo artist?" Kash asked doubtfully.

"Yeah. Used to be anyway."

"Got a reference?"

"Nope."

"Got any examples of work?"

"Nope."

"Do you even have any tats?"

Vax fiddled uncomfortably with his collar. "Yeah. One on my back, it's a...it was a bit of a botched job. I'm having it removed."

Kash winced, his shoulders tensing. "That hurts like a mother, a cover up would be easier, probably cheaper too."

Vax cocked his head. "Isn't it bad manners to try and sell something to a possible employee?"

"Got to pay the bills somehow," Kash shrugged, leaning back in his chair. "Do you have any credentials at all?"

Vax fished into his pocket, taking out a card. "I've got my license." And for once it did actually belong to him.

"Which is better than most people, Cashew." The woman at the back finally made herself visible, slinking out a door behind the counter. She was dark skinned and bright eyed, throwing arms covered in snaking ink patterns round Kash's neck, tugging him into a tight hug. "Besides," she looked Vax up and down. "He's not that bad a looker."

Vax's cheeks flushed bright red. "V-Vax'ildan," he stuttered. "I'm Vax'ildan."

"Zahra," the woman beamed. "It's a pleasure." She let go of Kash, straightening up, her hands on her hips. "We keeping him?"

"Perhaps," Kash twisted his lip, propping up his chin on his hand. "He's got the credentials, and it's not like anyone else has applied. He gave a loud sigh. "We'll give you a trial period. See how you do."

Vax perked up. "Wait, really?"

"Well if you don't want it—"

"No, no. I do!" Vax said quickly, his hands raised. "I just wasn't expecting it, I was actually looking for a…—" he slapped a hand to his forehead. "Fuck! I forgot, do either of you know where I can buy a jacket?"

The two tattoo artists exchanged looks. "Gilmore."

***

"Gilmore" apparently referred to Gilmore's Glorious Goods, a thrift store a little ways further towards the edge of the Slayer's Take. The air inside was thick with the spiced scent of perfumes, the shop door adorned with curtain of beads that, while pretty, got caught on Vax's hair as he pushed through.

"Welcome, welcome!" The man behind the counter called, a gentle smile on his lips. "Would you like a hand finding anything?"

Vax tugged himself free of the beads, wincing. "Nah—ouch. Just browsing."

The man nodded, turning to continue his conversation with another shop assistant, a stout woman with glasses who—if her face was anything to go by—was around a hundred-and-fifty-percent done with her fellow employee's shit.

Vax spared him a last glance as he made a B-line for a rack of multicoloured clothes. He was definitely handsome, that was for sure. Though his clothes were rather odd, while his friend wore a simple outfit of a purple collared shirt and jeans the man wore an almost neon-purple tracksuit, a golden ring on each finger. On anyone else the outfit would have looked absolutely ridiculous, but somehow he managed to make it work.

Vax'ildan turned his back and started rifling through the store's admittedly large selection of jackets. Most were in no way glorious as the shop's name would suggest, well, at least not to Vax. They were bright for a start, sickly yellows, reds and greens as though someone had vomited a fruit salad onto the rack. The only remotely dark-coloured item Vax could find turned out to be a hideously brown fleece (though Vax got the feeling it was at one point meant to be red). However it was comfortable enough when he tried it on, if a little bit big. Plus it was only $11, leaving some change left over.

The man behind the counter didn't seem to share Vax's high opinion, physically wincing as Vax dumped the coat before him.

Vax met his eyes for a second before asking "what's the matter?"

The female employee didn't even look at her friend. "Don't, Gilmore."

Vax shot her a confused look. "Don't what? What are you talking about?"

Gilmore shook his head, stepping out from behind the counter. "I could not call myself an employee of this shop if I let you buy that." He strode over to the clothes rack, pushing round coat hangers in a collection of quick, sharp movements.

The woman, who according to her name tag was named Sherri, facepalmed heavily.

"Look, man. You don't have to—" Vax was cut off as Gilmore raised his hand, gripping a dark red bomber jacket between his fingers

"Ah-ha! This—" he held it out to Vax. "This'll look much better, though it is a tad more expensive."

Vax couldn't help the crooked smile that crept onto his face as he took the jacket. "So, you're Gilmore?" He asked. "As in the glorious Gilmore?"

Sherri burst out laughing. A short, loud laugh that was repressed almost instantly. "Ha, no. That's his dad."

"Gilmore junior then?" Vax chuckled, slipping his arm through the sleeves.

"Shaun," Gilmore corrected. "Shaun Gilmore. And to who do I owe this pleasure?"

"Vax'ildan Doe," he glanced at himself in a full-length mirror propped up to one side. It actually looked pretty good.

"Quite the last name you got there."

"Says the man with the dullest first name on the planet?" Vax chimed, turning his hips so he could see the back. "How much did you say it was?"

"$35," Sherri deadpanned.

"I get the feeling someone's trying to turn a bigger profit." Vax looked to Gilmore who shrugged, but kept smiling none the less. "You're lucky someone else's paying." He ended up paying with a bit of his change along with what Pike had given him, but it was a really good jacket.

"Ooo! Looking good, Vax," Keyleth beamed, giving him a thumbs up.

"Thanks—hey!" Vax's sister hadn't even said a word to him and she was already going through his pockets. "What are you doing? Get off!"

"Just, hang on a sec. Ah-ha!" She held up Aldore's card triumphantly. "I'm just...going to get some cash out."

She abandoned her party at the side of the fountain where they'd eaten ice cream, a plastic shopping bag full of milk, bread, fruit and vegetables cutting indents in her palm. She walk out of the Slayer's Take, holding the credit card as though it was an armed bomb, pinched lightly between the fingers of her free hand.

There was a mechanic by the mall's exit, a garage facing the street full of cars all broken for whatever reason. Beside the mechanic was a dumpster.

Making sure no one was looking Vex lifted the lid, breathing deeply through her mouth so as to not subject herself to the reek of day old food scraps. She flicked the card inside and promptly shut it again, no harm no fowl.

"Vex'ahlia—"

"Gods above!" Vex whirled round, clutching her chest to find herself face to face with Percival Von whatshisname.

He'd swapped his hoody for a shit-coloured set of overalls, his eyes framed by the dark smudge of eyeliner. He looked slightly taken aback by Vex's sudden outburst. "You alright?" He asked.

"Yes, yes. I'm fine you just gave me a fright."

Percy chuckled. "I hope I'm not making a habit of it." He cleared his throat, looking back to the mechanic's for a brief moment. "I just wanted to apologise for the other day."

"Well, apology accepted. Don't worry about it." Vex waved her hand casually as though she were attempting to waft away her neighbours worries. She paused, "Did it work,the repellent?"

Percy nodded, turning back to face her. "I don't know if it was the repellent or the bang but my apartment is now rat-free. Which reminds me, I wanted to invite you and your brother round. Apology drinks." He scratched the back of his head. "It was Keyleth's idea in all honesty. I was just planning on making you something but she can be rather...insistent."

"Oh I know."

"Percival!" Someone called the man's name from within the mechanic, an old man hopping around the open bonnet of minivan. "Breaks over! I haven't all day. Come, come!"

"On my way, Viktor!" Percy replied, raising his shoulders in an apologetic shrug. "Sorry, I've got to go."

"We'd love to."

"What?"

Vex smiled. "Apology drinks sounds like a wonderful idea."


	6. Your Soul is Forfeit...Maybe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The game mentioned in this chapter is kinda a mix of super smash bro's and team fortress. For reference.

Vex and Vax were greeted by Percy at the door of his apartment with three words: "Don't touch anything." This was followed quickly by: "sorry, but everything has its place."

Vax walked past him, his hands stuffed into his pockets. "Sure thing, Percival."

Vex raised her eyebrow, quickly mouthing "sorry." As she followed her brother inside.

The basement was a one room. Kitchenette shoved against the far wall, a bed with plain grey sheets in the corner, sofa and coffee table set up before a TV. It stank of oil and nicotine, but it was somewhat evident that Percy had made an attempt at ordering things as seen through the odd piles of random crap.

Percy made his way over to the fridge, tugging it open and leaving the twins standing in the centre of the room. "I've got soda, red bull or just beer."

"Beer'd be nice Percival." Vax cast an eye over the room. "Oh nice!" He snatched up a model gun that had been left on the coffee table.

Vex peered over his shoulder. "What is it?"

"I'm surprised you don't recognise it, sister," Vax showed her the bronze, almost steampunk-looking weapon with a cat-like grin. Along the barrel Vex spied the words "Pepperbox" neatly engraved in looping cursive.

"You play Watchover?" She asked, remembering the many times she's seen the gun on her TV screen. Clutched between the fingers of a Gunslinger who was far, far too OP.

Percy nodded, tucking two cans in the crook of his arm. Cracking open a third with his free hand. "I did say don't touch anything—"

"It's a really good replica..." Vax flicked open the barrel and gave a small, inhuman sounding shriek. "Not a replica." He dropped the gun, the metal banging against the surface of the table, allowing Vex to spy the bullets lined up neatly inside. "Why the fuck do you have a gun on your coffee table?!"

Percy took a long sip of beer, leaving the question unanswered for a good pause. "I have a licence," he said bluntly, wiping his mouth on the back of his hands. "And honestly what part of don't touch anything do you not understand?"

Vax looked to Percy, his face contorted into a look of pure and utter confusion. "Does Mercer know?"

Percy shrugged. "It's not like I fire it a will. It's a little..." He cocked his head, pausing for thought. "Pet project."

Vex perked up. "You made this?"

Percy puffed up his chest with pride. "Yeah. It's not quite done yet, just need to finish the paint job. But I've been working on it for a few months now."

Gingerly Vex lifted the gun, closing the barrel with a swift and satisfying snap. It was impressive. Completely illegal, but impressive.

"I think," Vax interrupted his sister's train of though. "Everyone in this building fucking insane. Wonderful—" he added as Percy shot him a dirty look. "—but fucking nuts."

At this Percy laughed and nodded. "Yes," he agreed. "We are." The looked past the twins to his television set, gesturing to the machine with a smile. "Let's take our minds off it with a game."

Watchover was not made with three player split-screen in mind. This caused the monitor to be split rather oddly with a horizontal line across its middle and one vertically across the screen's lower half. This meant that one player took up two-fourths of the screen while the other two players were pushed down to the bottom left and right corners.

According to Vax having the top screen was no worse than cheating, and he made his opinion very clear as Vex (who at that point in time took up the aforementioned fourths) struck a sci fi energy-arrow in his character's jugular.

"Fuck!" He rested his forehead against his controller as his screen turned red. The words "Game Over. Death Match Third Place," hanging over the crumpled corpse of his dashing rogue. Gushing red blood spraying a pattern against the level's wall.

"Better luck next time, brother." Vex grinned from ear to ear, sneaking a look to Percy out the corner of her eye.

He sat, perched like a crow at the very edge of his sofa. He seemed calm, his features slack as his gunslinger darted across the screen. His concentration hinted at only by the black cigarette clutched tightly between his teeth, unlit. His eyes stay fixed on the screen, on the little steampunk-gunslinger making his way across the main catwalk of the stage, towards Vex.

Curling her lip Vex notched another arrow, leaping and bounding across the roof tops of the industrial cityscape, aiming her sights on the gunslinger.

With a sharp flick of his thumb Percy rolled into cover behind a chimney, only just managing to dodge Vex's shot. "Nice try," he jeered as his character popped his head out from behind the metal pipe, raising the Pepperbox in hand.

"Your soul is forfeit!" Both the character and player said the line together as Percy activated the gunslinger's special move. A barrage of ice-blue laser-like bullets dotted across Vex's screen, the red line indicating her health chipping away with each shot.

The screen turned red. A slosh of cartoon blood seeping down to cover her fallen ranger. "GAME OVER."

Percy placed his controller on the coffee table, a smug look across his face. "Good game," he said casually, pushing his glasses up his nose as a high score boards rose into place.

Most of the ten titles bore the four initials of PERC, including the top spot. However there was two instances of divergence from this norm, the first being the third place spot in which Vex had already entered her name, and the second being the tenth: KIKJ. A person who had beaten Vax by 216 points.

Vax scowled. "Who the fuck is Kikj?"

"Hm? Oh, that's Keyleth," Percy explained, his smile softening with a slight fondness. "I have the feeling she was meaning to put Kiki, but hit the confirm button too fast."

Vex picked up her can of beer from the coffee table and took a long sip. "You two friends?" She asked.

Percy nodded before pausing as though he was considering something. "We are rather good friends, yes. We study together from time to time."

"You a student then?" The question came from Vax this time, his anger at having being robbed at his chance of victory replaced by curiosity.

Percival de Rolo the Third laughed, a small bitter "ha." His head tilted back against the headrest of the couch, his eyes meeting the blotchy ceiling patterns of damp spots. "Pelor's rays no. I couldn't afford it even if I wanted to."


	7. Simple Mistakes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A short update this time as school as been a literal bitch.   
> Also the actual plot will start soon, pinky promise.

Vax'ildan was witness to something he believed was only possible in movies; his soda was perched at the edge of the vending machine shelf. He'd tried shaking the machine, kicking it, whatever, but the drink simply wouldn't budge. 

This was especially annoying, as according to his watch, he only had another twenty minutes of lunch before he had to head back to Tattoos and Piercings. 

"You look like you could some help, friend." Shaun Gilmore tapped a hand against the side of the vending machine, the other held aloft and curled finger-to-thumb. 

"Depends, you offering?" Vax replied coyly, giving the machine a last kick. 

Gilmore raised his brow, disappearing behind the machine. "The trick with this one," he explained, placing his shoulder up against the metal backing. "Is to give it a bit of a push." He shoved up against the machine which tilted forward slightly before rocking back into place as the soda fell into the collection shoot with a heavy clunk. 

"Thanks, man." Vax quickly picked up the can as Gilmore revealed himself from behind the machine, leaning his shoulder against the side of it. 

"I swear," he said with a shake of his head. "This things been broken for years. You'd be better off buying from the food court." 

"That where your heading?" Vax asked, tapping the top of the can with his finger. 

"It is indeed, I'm on lunch break." 

Vax gave a small smile, "looks like we're off at the same time then. I don't suppose you could show me around sometime?"

"I certainly could." Gilmore paused, raising a finger. "And I won't—"

Vax cracked open the can, a fountain of soda erupting from it, spraying his jeans and wetting them through. 

"—do that..." Gilmore snorted, raising a hand to his mouth as Vax tried to hold the fizzing can as far from him as he could. 

"What the hell?!" Vax swore, his brows narrowed sharply as he scrubbed at the thigh of his pants with his free hand, trying to use the wool of his glove to soak up some of the mess. 

"Did I mention this thing was broken?" Gilmore laughed. "Like I said, you'd be better off buying from the food court." 

"You did that on purpose."

Gilmore placed a hand to his chest in mock offence. "I would do no such thing!" He argued with a smile. "In all honesty some kids from the school round the block rigged it up. How exactly they managed it I have no idea." 

Vax frowned, looking down at his jeans. "This is the second time this happened in two weeks," he mused, much to Gilmore's confusion. 

"What?"

"Oh, my fuckwit of a neighbour thought it be funny to chuck a bucket of water over my head," Vax explained with a scowl. "That reminds me, I really need to get the fucker back." 

"Well, good luck with that, but first—" Gilmore gestured to the sign a small distance down the way from them displaying directions to the toilets. "—perhaps you should clean up. It looks rather," he gave a small chuckle. "Well, rather awkward." 

***

"Why the hell didn't you tell me you had a sister?!" Were the first words Vax heard as he entered his place of work, a handful of minutes late from lunch. He looked to Kashaw who stood behind the counter, Vex to one side of him, Zhara to the other. He looked cartoonishly angry, as though smoke would start exploding from his ears any minute. Vex and Zhara on the other hand looked as though they were on the edge of a burst of laughter, their lips curled into near identical masks of smugness.

"I'm, pretty sure I did," Vax answered, his eyes narrowed in confusion. "What are you doing here anyway?" He asked Vex.

"Trinket chewed up his bed. Again. I was getting a new one," Vex explained with a shrug. "But I...er...got roped into doing a rush job instead." 

Zhara snorted at this, clapping a hand to her mouth as Kash shot her a dark look. "Oh, don't look so grumpy darling, it is very funny."

"He could sue!"

"She did a fine job Cashew," Zhara retorted, placing a hand on her friend's shoulder. "Besides, it's your fault for getting them mixed up, they really don't look that alike." She flashed Vax a sharp grin. "I was waiting to see when he figured it out—"

"You knew!?“ Kash groaned, burying his face in his hands. 

Vax was silent for a long pause in stunned silence before bursting into a fit of loud, long laughter. "You're lucky she's a tattoo artist," was all he managed between the breaths. "Perhaps you should hire her, Cashew."


	8. One out of Six isn't a Failure, Right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *rises from the grave* not dead, just busy. Exams are legitmatly round the corner but I managed to write this while procrastinating. So, here's the long over due eighth chapter.

The week started, as it often does, with a Monday; on which, Vax'ildan Doe prepared to carry out a touch of revenge on his hulking mass of a neighbour. Or at least that was the plan.

Matt's cane ended up stopping him short. Hitting him hard in the shins and blocking his way towards the stairs, almost causing him to fall over his own two feet in the process.

"Vax'ildan," the landlord said with a sigh. "How old are you, exactly?"

"Twenty-four, why?" Vax asked, hugging the bucket he was carrying to his chest as he tried to steady himself.

Matt cocked his head, his face deadpanned as he spoke. "Why are you trying to wreck my house?"

"Psh! Whatever gave you that idea?!" Vax asked, trying his damnedest to sound surprised.

"What's in the bucket?"

"What bucket? I don't know what you're talking about!"

Matt hung his head, another even greater sigh escaping from him. "Vax, you can try all you like to get this past me, but I promise you will fail." He raised his finger to his ear. "I heard whatever it is you've got in there banging around in there. What's in the bucket?"

"What...how did you?..."Vax's expression turned sour, his shoulders slumping in defeat. "It's flour bombs."

"Pay back?"

Vax nodded, paused and mentally hit himself before uttering a small "yeah."

For a moment Vax was sure Matt was rolling his eyes. "Look, I don't mind you and Grog pulling pranks. However, I do mind my house getting destroyed because of it—"

"What, Percival can blow up who-knows-what, but I can't play a prank?" Vax argued, gesturing a hand towards the basement stairs. "How's that fair?!"

"Percival cleans up."

"I was going to use the tarp!" Vax argued as Matt snatched the bucket from his hand, fumbling for a moment in an attempt to grab the handle.

"Sure you were." The landlord tucked the bucket under his arm, moving his cane out of Vax's path. "If you're serious about this try asking Shorthalt, he's been at this for a while."

***

"And, did you ask him?" Gilmore asked, a cup of soda halfway to his lips, his voiced raised so he could be heard over the buzzing rumble of voices that hummed about the Slayer's Take food court.

Vax shook his head in reply, stuffing a handful of fries into his mouth. "I had tah go tah work," explained, his mouth full. "Besides I won't have time to try again today. The big guy goes to the gym in the morning. The plan was to get him as he went downstairs."

"But your landlord stopped you," Gilmore said pointedly, a small smile on his lips.

"But my landlord stopped me!" Vax echoed bitterly. "I'm honestly starting to think the bastard's psychic or something."

Gilmore raised an eyebrow, giving a light chuckle as he set down his cup. "Maybe. I'm guessing you're going to try something else then?"

"Oh, hells yeah. Now I've got a point to make."

"I thought you already had a point to make."

"Well now I have two!" Vax cried, his expression deadly serious. "I just have to think of a plan B."

Gilmore stayed quiet for a moment, stirring his drink with its straw. He gave a small, low laugh before leaning forward, resting his elbows on the table. "I think I might have an idea."

On Tuesday Vax dusted off the largely underused cooking utensils of Apartment 2-B and got to work. Placing a bowl over boiling water he melted several handfuls of chocolate, filling the Apartment with an almost sickly sweet aroma of milk chocolate and rousing Vex from her room.

"Preparing for Halloween a little early are we brother?" She asked, picking up one of the dozen candy apples laid out the kitchen side.

Vax shot her a sharp, holding an apple by its stalk to avoid scalding his fingers as he covered it in a thick layer of chocolate. "Not exactly—and I wouldn't eat that one if I were you." Setting down the apple he took the sweet from his sister, snatching a knife from the holder and cutting it in half. As he did the scent of coco and candy were replaced by the sharp and eye-watering stench of raw onion.

His sister raised her brow, casting wary eyes over the spread set out before her. "Should even ask I ask?"

"Preferably not. Here." He handed her one of "apples" placed towards the back of the set. "The ones with sprinkles are booby trapped."

Vex took a careful bite, relaxing slightly as the fresh taste of fruit filled her mouth. "They look good," she remarked, nodding to the line of sprinkled onions.

"That's the idea," Vax replied, looking through the cupboards. "I thought they gave us a tray."

"They did, by the sink."

"Thank you~"

Vex set herself down on the side of the kitchen counter, taking another bite of her candy apple. "You're seriously taking this payback thing to heart, aren't you brother?"

"Yep," Vax placed a wooden tray on the side, loading it with sweets both real and fake. "Wish me luck!" He called as he stepped over Trinket on his way to the front door.

"I have no part in this."

"Love you too, Sister."

Vax rapped on the door of Apartment 3-A with one hand, trying his hardest to hid his grin as Grog Strongjaw tugged open the door. He hadn't missed him, perfect!"

"Vex, wut you want?" The monster of a man asked, his head slanted slightly to the side, his eyes fixed on the tray of chocolate treats.

"I'm Vax, big man. But Vex made some of these to take to work and well," he tried his hardest to hide his grin, "she made a little too many. I thought you and Pike might want a few."

Grog nodded, reaching out and taking the largest of the apples, one covered in a thick layer of sprinkles. Apparently completely none to wiser to what he was getting himself into grog gave a wide grin before a great chunk out of the onion.

Vax held his breath, watching as Grog chewed, swallowed and stuffed the rest into his mouth in one go.

"'Tis good," he said, plucking three more from the tray. "Thanks."

"You're...welcome." Vax trailed off focusing all his concentration on keeping his jaw from hitting the floor. What the fuck was wrong with this man?!

"See ya' later," was the last thing Vax heard as the door swung shut, leaving him alone in the hallway.

"Gods above!" He groaned, running his free hand through his hair before turning in the direction of Emon's rooftop garden. The door was open, a clear sigh that Keyleth was busy tending to her plants. He might as well make use of the left overs, though he made sure to confine the onions to compost bin where they belonged.

On Wednesday Vax made use of Trinket's unholy amount of hair. Sweeping up a good few handfuls from the apartment floor and stuffing them into a rather shoddily-put together envelope.

"Most people would have taken yesterday as a sigh to give up, brother," Vex noted as she watched him at work, her bag slung over one shoulder in preparation for her to head off to the Slayer's Take.

"I'm not most people, am I?" Vax replied, gingerly getting to his feet, handling the package with care. "Meet you downstairs, I'm just going to drop this off." Vex didn't bother wish him good luck, rather choosing to let out loud and long sigh before heading off.

Vax made sure to be quick, laying the envelope in front of Apartment 3-A before knocking on the door and bolting round the corner. Using the camera on his phone Vax watched from behind the cover of the wall as Pike Trickfoot tugged open the front door, looked left, looked right before finally setting eyes on the present at her doorway. The paper was face up so as the name Grog, written in neat, curving letters was on full display which gave Vax hope as the nurse lifted it from its spot in the floor. Holding the door open with her foot Pike examined the envelope for a moment before turning her head.

"Grog, you've got mail!" She called, running her thumb along lip of the paper, tugging it open.

"Shit!" The word escaped Vax as a flood of dog hair fell from the bottom of the envelope, coating the small woman in mounds of thick, brown fur.

Pike didn't react with surprise, but rather looked to the corner where Vax was hiding. "Really?" She asked the empty space. Her brow raised in an expression Vax's mum had once given him when she'd caught him with his hand in the cookie jar as a child.

Vax hesitated. "...I'll go get a vacuum."

On Thursday Vax attempted to recruit help, knocking on Percival de Rolo's door at a quite frankly ungodly hour of the morning.

"How much would I have to pay you to make me a fire cracker?" He asked as soon as the white-haired hermit opened the door.

Percy looked Vax up and down with tired eyes, his lips bunched together at the corner of his mouth into a disapproving frown. Nope," was all he said before promptly slamming the door in Vax's face.

On Friday Vax spent the day laying face-first on the couch, a pack of frozen peas resting on his back.

"What's up with him?" Pike asked, popping her head round the door.

"First round of tattoo removal, Darling," came Vex's answer.

"Hurts like a fucking bitch," came Vax's, his voice muffled some by the pillows.

"Since you've just had a layer of your skin burnt off I can't exactly say I'm surprised," Pike said, her sympathetic tone sounding surprisingly genuine.

"Is there a reason you're here?" Vax grumbled, still not looking up.

Pike nodded, a deadset expression of seriousness on her face. "I was going to offer you a hand with the whole," she made a vague gesture with her hands. "Pay back, thing."

This was enough to earn Vax's interest as he turned his head to face her. "Go on."

Finally, on Saturday morning Grog Strongjaw awoke, somewhat inevitably, with only half a beard.


	9. Pub Crawl Time!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy crap what's that I see? Is it a plot!
> 
> Also I am removing the vax'more tag because I dunno if I'm gonna have it play a large role.

_Dearest inhabitance of Apartment 2-B,_

_I humbly invite you to join us, fellow men (and women) of Emon, in getting completely shit-faced._

_Please meet us at the Red Worm Tavern at eight o'clock Friday evening._

_Bring booze-money and song choices for Karaoke._

_No need to RSVP._

_Sincerely,_

_Scanlan Shorthalt of Apartment 2-A._

"It's something he does whenever newbies move in," Keyleth explained with a hint of a smile, her lips painted pink, her eyes carefully lined. She leant with her elbows on the bar, a glass of Shiraz in one hand. "A bit of fun so we get to know each other."

"And it only took him, what a month?" Vax quipped with a sharp grin, eyeing a somewhat square bottle behind the bar that seemed to contain some kind of worm floating in it. He'd been debating asking if was an actual drink or just decoration for roughly two minutes and he was set at a standstill.

The Red Worm, as it turned out, was one of the more shadier seeming bars he'd visited in his life time. Done up like a speakeasy with a doorman and everything (thank the gods he hadn't asked for a password). The inside was small and cramped, a windowless room that reeked of cheap beer and failed dates.

"It was this or a road trip," Scanlan admitted from where he stood on top of a barstool, though in all honestly at first glance it would have been easy to think him a man standing. "A night like this involves planning Vax. Planning and scheduling—"

"—n' booze," Grog interrupted, speaking more to the contents of his pint than to the friend at his side.

"N' booze!" Scanlan parroted, giving Grog a winning nod.

Most all the inhabitance of Emon had dragged themselves into the dive of a bar that was the Red Worm with only Mercer taking leave (though Vax and Vex were unsure if he had been invited in the first place). Only two persons present had been obviously dragged out against their will; the first being Percy de Rolo himself who had arrived with Keyleth leading him by the arm and who had taken to clinging to the tavern walls as though they were his only remaining tethers to reality. The second was Allura Vysoren who had arrived in similar fashion with Tiberius, introduced to the group as "a good friend from school."

"You take Mythology, right?" Keyleth asked almost instantly, a wide and welcoming smile on her lips. "I think I've seen you at the college. I'm working on political science at the moment, with Professor Uriel—"

Vax choked on his drink. "Political science? Since when?!"

Keyleth frowned, the corners of her mouth dipping into a low pout. "Since two years ago! Why's that surprising, cause I'm a girl?"

"Ooo, you fucked up," Vex jeered as her brother lent back slightly in his chair.

"No, I didn't say that. I mean. I knew you were at college but I thought you were doing...I dunno agriculture or something." He scratched the back of his neck sheepishly. "I mean, politics is all serious and you're, well, not—not like that's a bad thing!"

Vex got up at this point. While she was perfectly content to watch her sibling dig himself into a progressively deeper and deeper hole, she was also content in finding out whatever the hell wallflower-McGee's deal was.

"Percy," she said, making him jump slightly, fumbling about to avoid dropping a small metallic object he had resting on his palm. In the other hand, gripped gently between thumb and forefinger, he held a screwdriver no larger than his little finger.

Fuckin' nerd.

"Vex," he echoed her tone, clearing his throat as he went back to screwing a small piece of metal into place. He paused for a moment, looked her up. "It is—"

"Yes. It is." Vex rolled her eyes before pointing to the device in his hand. "What's that?"

"It's...well, here you take it." He held out his hand to her. Vex gave him a quizzical look before slowly reaching out to touch the device. As soon as she did a sudden jolt of electricity sparked at her skin, causing her to shudder. "Ouch!" She scowled, whipping her hand away.

Percy didn't laugh at his trick, but managed a smile, pushing a button on the back side of the machine. "Joy buzzer," he explained, slipping it neatly into the pocket of his hoodie.

Vex shook her hand, wincing as she the tingling shock faded from her hand. "Guns and joy buzzers, what's next, a bomb?" She stopped suddenly, raising a finger. "Please don't actually make a bomb."

Finally, Percy smile. "No promises."

"Dare I ask why you brought a joy buzzer to a pub crawl?"

Percy frowned. "Is that what we're doing?" He asked and Vex wasn't sure if he was joking. "Never mind. But the joy buzzer, one of my brother got me to make him one a little while ago. They're rather simple and pass the time so..."

"I didn't know you had a brother."

"I have three," Percy mumbled, rubbing his chin. "Plus a few sisters."

Vex let out a low whistle. "Gods above, I can barely handle Vax."

Percy shrugged, avoiding Vex's eye, instead taking to watch the other members of his group lined up along the bar. "What's the matter with her?" He asked, nodding in Allura's direction. She sat between Tiberius and Keyleth, but had a distant look about her, as though her mind and thoughts were somewhere else. The drink Tiberius had ordered for her left untouched before her, the glass sweating as the ice melted in the heat of the room.

"Dunno," Vex replied. "Never met her before."

Percy hummed, leaning his back against the wall. Vex waited for him to continue the conversation, frowning when he didn't. "Can I get you a drink?"

"Isn't that what I'm supposed to ask?"

"Well, if you're offering to pay..."

Percy smiled, shaking his head. "I'll just have a beer."

"Coming right up, grumpy." Vex returned the the bar, eyebrows raised. "And I thought you were emo," she said to her brother, her voice low just in case Percy could her here.

"Maybe he's shy," Vax suggested, lifting his pint to his lips.

"Oh, no he is always like that," Keyleth chirped, speaking slightly into her wine in a very Grog-like manner. "He just needs a bit of help—hey Percy!" She raised her voice over the babble of regulars, waving her hand at the man across the room. "Wanna do karaoke?!"

"No," came a rather blunt reply.

"They have MCR," Keyleth added, wiggling her eyebrows.

"Oh, grand. You sing, I watch."

"Who says grand anymore?" Vex interrupted, counting the coins in her purse in exchange for the cheapest possible beer on the list.

"Snooty arseholes with long-ass names," her brother answered. "Come on, Percival! Loosen up."

Percy looked as though he wanted to sink into the floor, but still put one foot in front of the other and marched over to join them. "Would you all please stop shouting?"

Grog butted in at this bit, his breath so thick with drink that it was probably possible to light with a match. "WUT ABOUT YELLIN'?" He roared causing Percy to lean away from him, a ring in his ears.

Vax steadied Percy, placing a hand on his shoulder. "Tell ya' what," he said, a devil's smile on his lips. "If you sing something, I'll get whatever the hell that is," he pointed to the worm-jar, having finally made up his mind.

"You're going to drink mezcal?" Percy asked doubtfully, one eyebrow cocked. "You do realise that worm isn't for decoration, you're meant to eat it."

Vax blanched, his face turning a sickly white, but nodded all the same.

Percy smiled smugly before looking over Keyleth's shoulder at the song list. "Can someone put on Teenagers?"

***

The mezcal didn't look to bad; a nice clean glass with a lemon slice on the rim, and a worm at the bottom. That tended to take away from the aesthetic.

Vax eyed the glass cautiously, surrounded on all sides from his fellow housemates. "I'm sorely regretting this," he announced, lifting the glass to his nose and taking a small sniff. Didn't smell too bad honesty, in fact it smelt quite nice.

"Perhaps you should do it in one go?" Scanlan suggested. "Worm and all."

"Maybe," Vax made a face before raising the glass in a toast. "If I die, Trinket gets my stuff." And with that he downed the drink.

At first it tasted fine, smokey and rather strong. A good drink all in all. But then he felt the worm (which, as Tiberius had informed him, was in fact a moth larva and not a worm) pass his lips. An involuntary shudder crawling up his spine as it slid down his throat. Vax grit his teeth, slamming the glass down and holding back a gag as Grog congratulated him with a great thud on his back.

"How'd ya feel?" He asked.

"Like I just ate a fucking worm," Vax shot back with a scowl. "Percival's shitty sunging...sung... _singing_ wasn't wurth—worth it." Midway through the sentence Vax's tongue seemed to stop cooperating, his speech slurring slightly."

"That was certainly fast," Tiberius observed, looking up from his watch. "I didn't think it would have any affect for at least a few minutes."

"He did down a drink you're meant to sip," Percy pointed out, his arms crossed smugly over his front.

"I what?" Vax mumbled, his eyes narrowed. "Shorty said I shoulda...fuck ah sound like Grog." He leant forward, resting his forhead on the bar. "Teenager scare da living  
Shit outta me," he half sang, half mumbled into the wood as the rest of his group burst into fits of laughter. All accept Allura, who jumped in her seat, seeming slightly frazzled but the sudden burst of noise.

"Are you alright, Allura?" Tiberius asked, a look of concern across his face.

"Hm? Yes, Tiberius I'm fine. I'm just a bit," she hesitated, tapping a finger against the bar. "Distracted."

"Could-ant fu-fuckin' tell," mumbled Vax, raising a hand, but not his face. Vex dug him in the ribs with her elbow.

"What's the matter, darling?" She asked.

"Oh, nothing you should be concerning yourself with."

"I'm not concerned, I'm curious. Come now, what's bothering you."

Allura's mouth formed a straight line, her eyes moving from Vex to Tiberius. "Fine," she signed. "I have a friend, Kima, she lives in a city a bit north of here and well, I haven't heard from her in a while." She looked to the floor, nibbling slightly on the inside of her lip. "She hasn't been online or answering her phone. No ones heard from her at all and I'm...I'm worried about her."

"Is it a possibility that she's just busy?" Scanlan asked, a touch tactlessly.

"For almost two weeks?" Allura snapped, leaning an elbow on the bar, her chin in her hand. "It's, just not like her to disappear so suddenly like that."

"Perhaps you should pay her a visit, check if she's alright," Percy suggested, shooting Scanlan a sharp look.

"I would if I could," Allura admitted truthfully. "But I can't get any time off and it would be a two day trip there and back. I've tried negotiating but my... _bastard_ of a manager doesn't see it is a good excuse." Her brow creased uneasily, her voice becoming bitter as she spoke. "They think I'm lying to get time off, as if they have _any_ idea of what's going on!"

"Mah-bee vee should go," Vax suggested, suddenly springing upright in his stool. "Cause your Ma-manager or whatever is fucking...fucking..."

"Evil?" Keyleth suggested.

"A waste of a soul?" Percy nodded.

"Ah massive cu—"

"Language Grog," Pike scolded, giving her friend's shoulder a shove. "But yes he is that."

"I wouldn't want to put you out of your way," Allura said quickly.

Scanlan shook his head, grinning from ear to ear. "Road trip!" He practically sang the words, clapping his hands.

Tiberius placed a kind hand on Allura's shoulder, smiling softly. "Allura, this is obviously troubling you, besides if your friend really is in trouble then someone should look into it."

"Agreed," Keyleth nodded, a look of pure determination on her face. "I'm sure at least one of us can get some time off work."

Allura's expression softened, a small look of relief working its way onto her face. "Thank you, Tiberius."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case you were wondering what Vax and Percy were singing 
> 
> http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=faG5mmkDbyc


End file.
